Rojak

Whenever I work from our Malaysia office, I feel like I’m part of a large extended family ruled by a matriarch, otherwise known as the Motherhen. The family is loud, noisy and it doesn't matter what position you hold in the company – as long as you are part of the coop, you cluck and get clucked around the same way as everyone els

This is us going for group lunch.

Motherhen: Okay, everyone ready or not?

Secretary: Wait, Mr. Tan not here yet.

Manager: Sales team meeting us there. They ask us to order first but Kelvin said he is vegetarian today so must have vegetables for him.

Motherhen:  Who else vegetarian? Is Laura joining us or she went gym?

Mr. Tan: I’m here!

HR: Laura got meeting. She asks us to tapao for her.

Motherhen: Mr Tan, please go toilet first before we go otherwise you kap liu later. Who else needs to go toilet? Faster go now.

Frou: I need to go toilet also!

You would think it’s just informal gathering that we speak like that…..

(Strategy meeting with external consultant – also Malaysian)

Frou: Okay, given the situation, why don’t we go back and seek an extension?

Motherhen: Yam gong! Yao mou gao chor ar? Last month we already ask and now you want me to crawl back to them? You think I can lay golden eggs for them ar?

Consultant: Ya wor, if you ask them again, they will ask you to go fly kite to Kelantan. I think we better buat bodoh and just do it.

Motherhen: Ok, we hantam first then see how.

And when we have to report upwards….

Motherhen: The situation is such that it is unlikely we can get further third party co-operation so after much consideration, the team is proposing to assume associated risks and proceed with the original timeline.

President: Frou, is that your understanding of the conclusion too?

Frou: Erm… yah.