Compelling Alcohol Truths

Dear Frou,

I got this from Yahoo News in an article entitled Top 5 Worst Beauty Habits:

3. Matching men drink for drink

From networking drinks to first dates and social events, there are many instances when women may feel compelled to keep up with the drinking habits of the opposite sex. However, women not only tend to weigh less than men but they have less body water to dilute the alcohol, which means they tend to get more drunk more quickly. To minimise the risks of alcohol on your health, try to keep within the recommended guidelines for alcohol consumption and alternate alcohol with soft drinks.

I would like to ask you if that is what we do. Do we feel compelled to keep up with the drinking habits of the opposite sex? Thing is, the members of the opposite sex we hang out with, i.e. Toi and The Man, do not drink. So who are we keeping up with? The Kardashians?

Something to mull over. Please let me know your thoughts tomorrow!

Regards,

Toe

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Dear Toe,

I am only compelled to keep up with YOUR drinking habits.

If you have 1 drink, I will have 1 drink. If you have 5 drinks, I will have 5 drinks. If you get a bottle, I will get a bottle.

In terms of drunkenness, I believe we dilute alcohol at the same rate because even though you are taller than me, I am broader than you therefore we should have more or less the same volume of 'body water'.

In terms of other "risks" of drunkenness, assuming we both fell flat on our faces from drinking, your injury will be more serious than mine given you  have greater gravity pull (due to your height) but in terms of likelihood of falling in the first place, I win over you because I trip over my short legs more often so therefore we should have more or less the same risk of injury. (By the way, last night at Cranberries concert, I fell on my face at the stairs when I was running to get you more beer. I didn’t remember it until this morning.)

All in all, I believe we are "compelling" alcohol buddies.
And our livers hate us.

Frou.