At first, it was the business folks from all over the world calling and emailing and wanting me to solve their contract problems. Fine, I solve. Then our seconded lawyer called me to complain that he is at wits end with a dumb business folk who just don’t get it. Fine, I take over and deal with said dumbo myself. Then, our contracts manager in India called to cry to me about some of her colleagues who are dumping work on her. Fine, I listen and gave words of encouragement such as “You can do it! Hang in there!” Then, some newbie from another department came over because he wanted me to explain what is conflict of interest. Fine, I explain. Then he switched to talking in Mandarin. Fine, I talk in Mandarin. Then, he doesn’t get it. Then, I explain in English. He still doesn’t get it. I repeat myself. He look at me with dopey eyes.
I suffer fools. Every single day I suffer fools.
Stressed out and bothered, I shoot off an email to Secretary Pig telling her what I want for my upcoming birthday. (No, it’s not obnoxious. I do this every year.)
I told her I want this:
It is a Tiger King pillow from G.O.D Delay No More, a concept shop in Hong Kong.
She replied and said she won’t buy it for me. Because she thinks it is ugly.
I said a tiger pillow is what I want, so just get it.
She said she will get me a roast goose necklace from G.O.D. instead.
I said I just want my tiger pillow.
She said she will get me a “Ciao! Hi!” doormat from G.O.D instead. (Yes, that is a crude word)
I said I just want my tiger pillow.
She forwarded my email to Toi and Phillip to get their consensus that the tiger pillow is ugly.
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I JUST WANT MY TIGER PILLOW!! *sobs into tee-shirt sleeves*
1 comment:
OH, I was wondering about the Radio-Silence from the President's office...generally rare and unheard of :) Okay OKAYYYY! Will send the man to pick up the Tiger Pillow King or watever, wrap it up tightly in 3 layers of paper and stuff it in my check-in luggage. No sense scaring myself needlessly.
~Secretary
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