I stared at the clock and considered my options. My eyes are bleary, my stomach is growling and my head is light. Slowly my hand reaches for the seat lever, and I rest my head back and decided that the best thing to do in my circumstances is to take a shop light nap first...
Just as I am drifting off to blissful sleepland, there came a loud rapping at the right side of my head. OUCH! What was that all about? I looked around and there is no one. It must be mind tricks. Again, I tried to settle back into sleepmode but as soon as my eyes are closed, the rapping started again. This time louder and more insistent. STOP IT! What is going on?
Hmm...wait a min, it's from the inside of my head. I know who she is... shit, DAMN!
Sporty Spice: HELLOOOOOOOO?
Frou: Go away.
SS: Yoo hoooo! Look what we have here? Time on hand, an hour to kill before work...
Frou: I'm tired. Go. Away.
SS: WAKE UP!!!!!!! *RAP RAP RAP*
Frou: Oi! That is enough. I barely slept last night. Give me a break
SS: You slept enough. You have been sleeping your entire lifetime. Now get up and carpe diem...
Frou: You go carp yourself..
SS: What's that?
Frou: I say, leave me alone. I have planned three climbs this week. I deserve this rest.
SS: No you don't. You have done jack shit last week. Your cardio's dipping, you ate that chocolate cake last Weds, you missed last Saturday's climb....
Frou: Yes yes, but that's cos I was sick all week. I have valid reasons to stay in bed and have that cake.
SS: Which is more reasons why you should get off your ass now and get back to the fitness regime
Frou: I am still wheeeeeezing
SS: Your heart is wheezing cos it lacks OXYGEN. You have your gym shoes in the boot. Go for a short run at the gym upstairs. Get pumped up!
Frou: I just showered
SS: There's a shower room in the gym
Frou: I just washed my hair this morning
SS: It still sticks out in all direction. You need another wash.
Frou: The gym smells
SS: Not as bad as this car. Look at that cockroach!
Frou: *WHACK* Roaches no more. The car smells fine. And I am going to sleep anyway. Goodbye.
SS: Well... don't blame me if you pass out in carbon monoxide poisoning and die a fat girl.
Frou: That won't happen!!
SS: And you fitting into that tube dress you bought won't happen either if you continue sitting on your ass!
Frou: GRRRRRRRRR....!!
SS: ROARRR!!
Frou: ARGHHHH!
SS: Trust me, I know what is best for you.
Frou: I'm going, I'm going. Now, get out of my head!
SS: Good girl. Ta Raaaaaa!!
I'm sure what I described is not foreign to you. Ahh yes.. you know what I am talking about. Whatever you named it, that annoying whiny irritating voice in you exists. Often when you are settling into what you like to do best (assumingly, absolutely nothing), it incessantly strikes you with guilth and makes simple pleasures (like sleeping and lepaking) absolutely tedious.
I tried understanding why Sporty Spice exists. The only reason I can come up with is the fact that there is two things, amongst others, that all human beings absolutely possess. One is conscience. The other, is vice.
Because these two co-exist - they are always in constant battle. Now, their strength differs from person to person. Some people may have a million vices and absolutely minimal conscience. That is often, a bastard make. Then there are some who have too much conscience and presumably little vices. That is often, a matyr make.
In normal humans, such raging battles between good (conscience) and evil (vices) is an everyday affair. Depending on how good you are in dealing with voices in your head, you can either learn to live with the battle, ignore it or like me, succumb to one of them after putting up a short perfunctory fight.
Now, my battles have always between my sloth (vice) and my want to look like Angelina Jolie (conscience). In a way, I am slightly glad that Sporty Spice exists. It is the only filter I have against looking a blimp.
This time round, I have won the battle. I'm not too sure that I will always stay this strong. I'm keeping all trotters crossed...
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