My Thai Cheeseburger

By the time they chase me out of the mall, it is nearly 10pm and I realize that I have forgotten to eat dinner.

Well, at least I have a lifetime supply of lingerie!

Lugging my shopping bags, I prowled Ploenchit Street looking for cheap eats. The hawkers were out displaying their fares and some were selling strange looking skewered BBQ meat and cut fruits. The latter is completely off my list but I also didn’t want to risk my stomach with the former. I just saw a magazine article earlier about how this dude found a dead rat head in his pack of prawn crackers. Not relevant but my point is, who knows maybe those are skewered rat meat?

Then I saw a blinking yellow “M” sign across the street.

I took extra care to make sure that I cross the street using an overhead bridge. Earlier during day, after my meeting has ended, I asked my Thai business partner whether I should take a taxi to On Nut BTS Station (it’s pronounced ‘On-Noot’, not On Nut; I found that out the hard way) from the opposite side of the road. She gave me an incredulous look of horror and fervently shook her head and hand simultaneously, saying ‘No! You will get killed crossing the road. NO!”

After I got across safely, I walk into McDonald cautiously. I am slightly uncomfortable with overseas fast food restaurants. It stems from the same concept of the rat head found in prawn crackers. Not that I think Singapore fast food is any cleaner but for sure the MOH checks back home are definitely more rigorous.

I must have looked like an odd ball standing and looking at the display menu with a frown. Everything was written in squiggles so I had to rely on the graphics. There was some strange looking animal running next to a picture of a burger with pinkish meat. Salmon? Crocodiles? RATS?? Oh sorry, it’s prawns.

I decided to go for something less adventurous like a cheeseburger. Also it is the cheapest, like 59 Bahts. I ordered room service earlier in the morning and I am still feeling guilty about spending 400 Bahts on two pieces of bread.

I wasn’t sure whether the service staff speaks English so I pointed at the cheeseburger picture and said “One.” Then I pointed at the drinks machine and said, “One Coke Zero”

When she rang up the cash register, I realize the price was just for one burger, as advertised (59 Bahts). Thinking that she has forgotten about my drinks order, I pointed at the drinks machine again and asked for a Coke Zero once more. She rang up the register and charged me an additional 24 Bahts.

When my food order came, I realize that she has brought me two Coke Zeros. That was when I realize that she has understood my initial order and that a burger and drink set costs only 59 Baht (S$2.60)! Since I only needed one drink, I smiled at her and said that I will leave the other one behind.

She and her fellow staff looked puzzled. I told them (slowly) that it was my mistake to order a second drink. They nodded their understanding and ask me to wait for my refund for the second drink.

Since the fault is mine, I didn’t think it was nice to let them go to the lengths to get me a refund so I said it is okay, I don’t mind paying for two drinks. But they were firm and insist that I get a refund. They needed the manager to come and unlock the cash register so they politely asked me to wait.

After waiting for about two minute or so (they won’t let me leave!), they decided that it would be easier to fork out their own money instead. So they dug deep into their pockets (and their colleague’s) to come up with 24 Bahts for me.

I felt like the silliest girl in Thailand as they handed me the money.

Bangkok, indeed the City of Angels.