1+1 = ???

Most of us are usually extremely optimistic when it comes to the concept of an ideal partner.

In our minds, he/she will be a independent person who can hold his/her own. We will lead separate lives, jobs and set of friends but we come together as a mutual complement, rather than the replacement, of our individualism.

In other words, 1 + 1 will equal 2 very capable 'in-duh-viduals' in love.

This concept, however, always inevitably evolves when you enters into a relationship ~ when you meet that perfect someone and want to share every bits of your lives together.

In the initial stages, you just can't bear to be apart even for a minute because you will just die (I suspect mostly of curiosity what the other person is doing). You exists substantially for the other person. When forced apart, you need to constantly sms or call to check whether your partner still have a pulse.

In other words, 1+1 equals to 1 happy blissful couple.

As your lives become more intertwined, the "I" will be eventually be replaced with a "we". It is no longer "I will love to come" but "We will love to come..... and can we bring our dog too? We can't possibly leave sweetsy-pootsie Bunny behind."

A simple "So how have you been?" will be answered by a rundown of you and your partner's work schedules, holiday plans and thoughts of adopting another dog because Bunny is sooooo lonely.

Other examples:

"What do you think of this?" ~ "Oh, you should ask him because he is very good at such things"

"Shall we catch this movie?" ~ "Oh I promised that I will wait for him to watch this one together"

"So what do you want to eat?" ~ "Oh, can we not have Indian because I might want to doggybag the leftovers and he (not Bunny) cannot take spicy food"

"Do you have a mind of your own?" ~ "Oh, I am using his because I lost mine the day I met him"

I do understand that it is hard to keep a separate life when you have to take another person into consideration all the time. Even if you are not a koala bear clinging onto an eucalyptus plant, your partner may be. That's why I prefer going out with couples (if the person is part of a couple). That way, I don't have to deal with the stress of knowing that that I am potentially taking him/her away from his/her lifeline.

No man is an island. No man stands alone. Eve was created for Adam. Just like Ken is created for Barbie and Ernie, for Bert. Companionship is often the crux of our individual happiness and fulfilment. I am very sure that I am guilty of the above-described (to some extent) when I am hooked up - aren't we all?

But fellas & ladies (and reminder to self), by all logic in this universe, 1 + 1 is still mathematically 2. Try to remember that sometimes.

"Society exists only as a mental concept; in the real world there are only individuals. "
- Oscar Wilde