Magic + two lonely souls + alcohol = ..............

Once upon a time, there lived a beautiful horse. Sorry, make that a mare. A pure white mare.

Miss Mare is extremely gorgeous and because she is gorgeous, she is lonely. Yes my friends, it is often lonely at the top of your game. All the other stallions just wants to get it on with her because of her looks but after that, they ditch her to be with the other not-so-good-looking-but-more-useful mares and fillies. Not to say that Miss Mare herself is useless but she has far better things to do than sit around, graze grass, conceive ponies and grow fat.

Miss Mare often wander into the woods with a bottle of gin, just chilling by herself. Sometimes she stops to climb a tree (cliff also can), gallop across a field of dandelions or waddle across a gentle flowing river. Nothing too strenuous, merely to keep in shape.

In her solitude, Miss Mare sometimes wonder whether she will ever meet the perfect mate. She often pass by other small furry (and useless) animals such as squirrels and beavers and watch them play in pairs. But often these small furry (and useless) animals get a bit too serious in their play and club each other to death and feast off the other’s decaying flesh. So Miss Mare is not that envious after all.

One day, while Miss Mare is walking in the woods, she saw a strange animal.

This animal is fully grown and looks beefy, rock hard and grey. What is most striking about ‘him’ (yes, his gender was rather obvious from where she stood) is that he has a gorgeous…..long….big… curving.... horn (what were you thinking??) on his face.

“What the HECK are you?”, neighed Miss Mare.

“Which rock have you been under? I’m a frigging rhinoceros.”, replied the unimpressed Mr. Rhino.

I forgot to mention that Miss Mare is rather ignorant of worldly affairs. She is after all beautiful. The ugly ones should be smarter, she thinks, because they need it more. God is fair.

To cut long story short, Miss Mare and Mr. Rhino became fast friends. Mr. Rhino is pretty much a vagabond and he finds the other female rhinoceros too large for his taste. He likes having this pretty, slim and rather bimbotic mare hanging around him. Miss Mare, on the other hand, finds him very interesting and funny. Furthermore, he is muscular and strong and she feels… protected around him. Bless her.

The inevitable happened, of course, one particularly drunken night.

The next morning, the two dare not look at each other in the eye.

“Do we need to talk about this?”, Mr. Rhino ask nervously.

“Well, what do normal animals do under such circumstances?”, Miss Mare ask in return.

The two of them didn’t know. Also normal animals don’t usually do things like smoke weed, get drunk and ravage one another. So they decided to just see what happens.

Many moons passed. The leaves grew green and began to fall. The snow fell too but the sun rises to melt the icy white blanket.

Come summer again, Miss Mare had a gigantic stomachache. She wonders if it is something she ate, monthly cramps or even UTI because she has been working out quite a bit lately while intoxicated. Alas, it was neither of the three. She went into the bush to have a dump but instead, a strange creature emerged from her.

She stared at it. And she screamed.

Mr. Rhino, who happened to be nearby (like in most drama series, the boy is never too far away), came trotting over (is it trot?). He too, was shocked.

“What the frig is that?”, he ask Miss Mare.

It turns out that their particularly drunken (and stoned) affair has resulted in a lovechild. But what a strange little creature it is! It has the beautiful form of a slender white horse but....

“It’s a… it’s a…”, they started in unison.

And the little creature suddenly raise an absolutely amazing curvish greyish horns just above its head.

“…….a UNICORN!!!”

Magically conceived between a mare and a rhinoceros - this creature HAD to be magical because there is NO way, under normal circumstances, those two species would have been able to procreate.

And that is also my answer to Dailytoe’s question on how unicorns came about......

:)