My big oyster bed

If you ask me what I am doing next Monday at around 8.45pm, I would give you the answer without blinking. Two Wednesday around 10.05pm? No problem. How about Sunday 5 weeks from now around noon? I might blink twice, but my answer would be forthright.

Of late, I'm beginning to realize that my life is an incessant run-of-the-mill routine. I have put in place, certain set activities I need to do every day of the week, besides work. I think I have successfully jam packed my every waking moments, leaving no room for spontaneity. I didn't think it was such a bad thing until I received recent comments.

I was away on one of my monthly trip to KL – you know, to chill out and hang with my old friends. Well, that is what I thought my monthly trips are for. I was chatting with a friend on the phone when I told him I have to hang up because I am running late. I can imagine him shrugging while he said, “Yeap, since you are done climbing, you should be due for your hair appointment now”. I was gob smacked. I asked him, “How the heck do you know that, smartass?” I imagine more shrugs from him. “Honey, you are SO predictable. It's what you do EVERYTIME you are down in KL at around this time on Saturdays. For the past 6 months” he replied.

Meeoow!

The second complainant is my trusty sidekick, Mr. Pig. I'm not just a creature of habit; I am an extremely obnoxious and imposing one. I set his routine for him –mostly same as mine. I gave him Tuesday nights and Sundays off.

So, while I was driving Mr. Pig to yet another one of ‘our’ appointment, I was telling him about how I have decided that our lifestyle needs more ‘technical skills’ and maybe I should add in cooking classes or a language course to our schedule. He shrugs (what is with men and their shrugging??!) and replied thoughtfully, “You know, have you ever wondered – at the end of all these things we do– what do they actually mean besides being time-fillers?”

I found the “Discovery Channel” answer to that question last night. It was raining and my planned routine activity (which requires dry land) was cancelled. Flicking through the channels, I came across a documentary on human behavioral patterns:

‘All of us need love and a companion to come home to at the end of the day. People who are seemingly busy, are in fact, just very lonely. They fill up their time everyday with a set routine because that is their only security. They find comfort in doing these things so that they don't have to deal with their loneliness’

If you are a MSN user, log on right now. Type “:” followed by “o”. Look at that emoticon. That was my face when I heard the above.

The thought that I am just doing all that I do everyday because I am running away from finding a boyfriend is incredulous. I sat there gaping at my TV for a good ten minutes.

Then I began to worry.

So, I began to examine each and every activity that I do and why I do them. Yes, there are some things I do regularly due to hedonistic human nature (like drinking and spa visits) but I also realize that my more regular hobbies are things which mean quite a big deal to me– often a reflection of something from the past.

I'm not going to verbal diarrhea on each of them but in general– I realized that I am doing so much now because for the first time in my life – I can. I am now able to pursue a sports goal without the need to compromise study time. I am able to travel without the need to ask for permission or pocket-money. I can pick up a new skill without fear of being ostracized by my peers for being ‘uncool’ (because nothing is uncool in the adult world). I can afford to do the things my poverty-striken youth is not able to.

The world is essentially – my big giant oyster. And without any strings attached to husbands, children or morgages, what is my excuse for being idle?

So why do I put them all in routine? Besides being a creature of habit, I find that being disciplined helps keep me goal-focus. If you want to pick up something new, don't just say it – do it. But don't just do it - keep at it persistently – until you get so extremely sick of it that you never want to do it again. Once is out of your system, move on. That way, you can fit more things in.

Cynical as I am, I am not one of those liberated women who will burn their bras and declare they don't need men. I do get lonely and I do believe in romanticism in the most traditional sense. Having someone to come home to who will hug me to sleep at night would be nice but unfortunately “love” is a whole lot more than just a human bed-warmer. Well, that is a whole new blog entry…

Besides I am so tired from doing so much, I probably appreciate more bed-space anyway…

The world is your oyster now
You can do as you want to do
The world is your oyster now
So go out and get laid
And get whatever you want to
- The Cranberries