The boy with two devils on his left shoulder

Phillip: So are we going out for wild partying this weekend? Wooooot!

Frou: No! I promised to be good

Phillip: Who did u promise?

Frou: The angel on my right shoulder

Phillip: I'm gonna kidnap her when I see you

Frou: WHY!?

Phillip: So that I can threaten to squeeze her self-righteous guts out if she doesn't advise you otherwise. Grrrrrrrrr!

Frou: *GASP*

Phillip: Then I will demonstrate by squeezing a packet of mcdonalds chilli sauce until the sauce burst out

Frou: NOOoooo!!

Phillip: See whether your right angel scared or not

Frou: OH MY! MY ANGEL SO POOR THING!

Phillip: She is not a poor thing. She's a party pooper.

Frou: I am assuming the angel on your right shoulder had, a long time ago, jumped ship to your left shoulder, eh?

Phillip: Yeap. As we speak, 'he' is massaging my left devil's shoulders...

Global Gathering

It was 3am on a Sunday morning at A'famosa (Malacca).

I was standing ankle deep in mud. This is one hell of a dirty place but obviously oblivious to the 20 over thousand people standing around me. Bass Agent was churning out hard trance and everyone was going absolutely livid. Datin was prancing around happily and splattering mud on everyone around her - she (nor they) didn't care.

Phillip was standing next to me. In fact, we have been standing at that same spot (stuck in mud) for the past hour. He reached into the left side of my combat pants and pulled out my bottle of stale Carlsberg and took a swig.

A couple of boys in front of us took of their shirts revealing abs that can rival Tyson Beckford. I ogled and listened. Definitely Singaporeans. I looked away when they started hugging each other - topless. Philip smiled.

An obviously drunk girl, held on possessively by her equally screwed boyfriend, came stumbling onto me. She peered at me through her Victoria Beckham sunnies and apologised. I gave her the thumbs up.

A friend covered in foam (yes, as in soap bubbles) came by trotting announcing that the Foam Bar is absolutely rocking and on solid ground. Phillip and I look down at our feet and decided that it is too much trouble to pull them out of the hardened mud now.

Phillip turned to me and said, "You know it right, this is exactly what we will still be doing at 40."

Amidst the stench of cow dung, I nodded.

You Pretty

The drama for the sake of drama between a gay boy and his fag hag....

Frou: Do u have a new work email address in your new job?

Phillip: I do. Why? Don't send any emails there please. I prefer to keep it separate.

Frou: Grr!! You're keeping things from me again! First, you changed your mobile number and never tell me. Now, you changed your email address. Are you trying to break up with me? HAR? HAR? HAR?

Phillip: Mei you, mei you (Translation: "Don't have, Don't have"). Things will get better... I promise you. Give it one more month...

Frou: YOU SAID THAT THREE MONTHS AGO! And things have not improved. You are slacking and not putting any work into this relationship. We have been together for 11 years and you haven't changed [oh fuckk... 11 years already!]

Phillip: [yeah, 11 years and her fats/voice also haven't change] Mei you lah... NI MEI NI MEI NI MEI NI MEI (Translation: "Don't have.... you pretty, you pretty, you pretty, you pretty")

Frou: OF COURSE I KNOW I PRETTY!!GRRRR. Tell me something I don't know!

Phillip: You're prettiest when you say nothing at all.... bet you dinch know that!

Frou: ...........

What I really really want.....

Phillip: Eh, I was listening to this morning Mix FM's breakfast show on my way to work. The topic of the day is "Women judge a man by their ringtones" and listeners would call up, and the DJs would play them snippets of some ringtones for them to decide what kind of man/woman would use them.

Frou: Oh!

Phillip: So this guy called in, and the DJs played a few snippets.
The 1st one was spice girls
That very irritating song "Do u want to" or something- their first hit.
U know which song rite?
Anyway, that guys said "a very irritating, loud girl will use this"
I immediately thought of u
You should use that ringtone

Frou: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Phillip: It's good
You have that unique character
Should embrace it

Frou: "Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want...."

Phillip: YES YES! Thats da song

Frou: "...I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
Really really wanna zigazig ha!"

Phillip: ZIGAZIG, HAR???

...........is to look like Posh Spice

I have a very cooperative friend this morning...

Frou:
OH WHEN I WAKE UP TONIGHT I SAY AHHHHHH
I'M GONNA MAKE SOMEBODY LOVE ME
I'M GONNA MAKE SOMEBODY LOVE ME
AND NOW I KNOW, NOW I KNOW..... NOW I KNOW.....

Phillip:
..........I KNOW THAT IT'S YOUUU!!!
YOU LUCKY LUCKY! YOU'RE SO LUCKY!!
DOO - DOO - DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO

I will get drunk in midst of strangers on my birthday

Frou: Can I invite Mr. B to my birthday party?

Phillip: No

Frou: Why not??!!

Phillip: Because I am the ‘ORGYNISER’ and I SAY NO. Please do not try to undermine my orgyniser's authority

Frou: But but but.. I’m the birthday girl no? Can I invite my other friends?

Phillip: If I invite them, they'll be there. That’s that.

Frou: Oh. I’d just consulted with the Queen and she says that I should not invite people from my past/present who are not good for me. I should spend my birthday with loved ones and people who treats me well.

Phillip: THATS EXACTLY WHAT I HAVE IN MIND WHEN I SAID NO TO MR. B!

Frou: (puzzled) Are u really looking out for my best interest? Or you are just lazy to entertain Mr. B? I know you said he is a bore before.

Phillip: Don’t have, don’t have. I only have your interest in mind. ARE U QUESTIONING MY WORDS??

Frou: In that case, can I invite people whom I never had any bad history with before? Someone safe and technically "good" for me. Someone like my climb buddy, JJ.

Phillip: Who says JJ is GOOD for u? He so fat - u will become fat also. Obesity spreads thru social network ah. Didn’t u know that? He's so not coming.

Frou: But but but....then will I even know anyone at MY party?

Phillip: You will know them when I introduce u to them.

Frou: ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**************************************************************************

DailyToe: For your bash this Friday, should we drive? Or maybe not eh?

Frou: But I don’t want to take cab! (Oh my gawd I’m so spoilt!)

DailyToe: Neither do I!

Frou: Oh my gawd WE are so spoilt!

DailyToe: But if we are going to drink from 830pm....we shouldn’t be driving *voice of reason resonates*

Frou:Wait a minute, what do you mean drinking? You said there will be no alcohol??

DailyToe: No alcohol your bladdy backside

Frou:

DailyToe: Even if your liver is shriveled, you'd still manage a drink.

DailyToe: …..or two

Frou: I’m so gonna quote this conversation in my blog. To show that you are such a DEVIL.

Frou: DEVILLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!

DailyToe: Ohhh... I’m so scared

DailyToe: My knees are a-knockin'

Frou: By the way, who uses "Backside" nowadays?

An exceptionally perceptive kid

Phillip: So do u think u would want children since you're stepping into middle age

Frou: WHAT MIDDDLE AGE! You little *&^%^@. Well...the answer is no, I don't want a kid right now. I dont even want a pet.

Phillip: So means you're still the children-hating monster lar

Frou: No. I don't hate kids. I just don't want them around me all the time. I'm sure I speak for you too.

Phillip: Yes. I cannot stand kids sometimes. I can be very mean when they annoy me. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Frou: I know. I saw you in action before. You just ignore them like they are ants. And they clammer all over u trying to get 'Uncle Phillip's' attention.

Phillip: No, I'm sure they all hate me too. Just 2 weeks ago, I went for dinner with a couple and their son. The kid was eating this plate of pasta. Normally he eats damn slow... pausing at every mouhtful to talk or play. But that night, he was eating very fast. When his mother asked him, why is he eating so fast - you know what he replied?

Frou: What??

Phillip: "LATER UNCLE PHILLIP WILL EAT IT ALL"

Frou:

Phillip: I tell you..I felt like squishing that little worm's head in that pasta plate. I was this close....

Fan's reaction to Paris's early release

Phillip: PARIS HILTON IS RELEASED FROM JAIL!
Frou: .....after only three days,
Phillip: WOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Frou: .....becos of an undefined 'medical condition' that renders her unfit for imprisonment,
Phillip: YES! THANK GOD!
Frou: ....and she sought pychiatric treatement after her first day due to trauma. WEAK!
Phillip: Can't blame her. She's so gorgeous, of cos she'll be traumatised.
Frou: .......
Phillip: I think she's FAB
Frou: I think you're crazy

No traffic jams in Heaven

froufrou says:
"天無絕人之路 - What does this mean?

Phillip says:
Wah lau, so deep! Did u cut & paste from one of your drama-series dialogue?

froufrou says:
No no. Someone left me a comment on my blog. So what does it mean?

Phillip says:
It says TIAN WU JUE REN ZI LU

froufrou says:
Wah lao! Chiem-alogy! Meaning what?

Phillip says:
Literally ; Heaven don’t have a road that kills people

Phillip says:
Meaning : There is always a solution to all problem

froufrou says:
OHHHH! No wonder u think I took that from my drama series. I think the last one I watched, one of the characters said something like that.

Phillip says:
Every drama series sure got wan. An old folk or kampung folk will say something like that to their estranged son or daughter or their kampong-folk fren who went to city to work…

froufrou says:
..and encounter a lot of modern day problems that they never faced in their kampungs and is feeling dejected?

Phillip says:
Yes, then someone will tell them:"天無絕人之路

froufrou says:
Heaven sounds like a good place hor? No roads and won’t get langgar by cars….

Bali High - Panaromic view from Lip's camera

(Legian Beach, Dreamland & Uluwatu)

Conflicted Drama Queen

On Saturday night 10pm, while driving to our favourite swanky gay-friendly bar, my friend Phillip proclaimed loudly that he has given up alcohol for 2007. "It does absolutely nothing for me and it's such a waste of money. What's more, you end up with a horrible hangover the next day. No, no more alcohol for me".

At 10.30pm at our favourite swanky gay-friendly bar, my friend Phillip ordered a diet Coke.

At 11pm, my friend Phillip pilfered a sip of Mojitos from my girfriend, Joan.

At 11.30pm, Phillip finished Joan's entire glass of Mojitos.

On Sunday night 12am in our favourite swanky gay-friendly bar, my friend Phillip finished my girlfriend, Joan's second glass of Mojitos.

At 12.30am in our favourite swanky gay-friendly bar, my friend Phillip whispered to me, "How about a round of Lycee Martinis?"

On Sunday night 1am while driving to our usual clubbing joint, my friend Phillip giggled and said he is kind of high.

At 1.30am at our usual clubbing joint, my friend Phillip brought back two tall glasses of beer from the bar.

On Sunday morning 10.30am at home in bed, my friend Phillip finally came to, wiped his sleepy eyes and sigh, "I'm still floating from the alcohol. I love this feeling. Miu!"


Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy

I love Paris Hilton

Phillip says:
have u heard that paris hilton song, "Stars are blind"?

froufrou on the rocks says:
yes it is playing in every club - "Baby....I'm perfect for youuuuuuuuu...."

Phillip says:
IT'S SO NICE!!!!! I LOVE!!

froufrou on the rocks says:
WHY?? It's so annoying

Phillip says:
Hmph, it annoys u only becos its paris hilton. But I love her - she's so cool! I read on the star newspaper yesterday that she says many girlfriends she know are rich and only date rich men. She says she never want to be dependent on a man. She's so IT!

froufrou on the rocks says:
Someone obviously have stars in his eyes....